Stories from the Stringam Family Ranches of Southern Alberta

From the 50s and 60s to today . . .



Monday, April 28, 2014

The Great White (Blonde) North

See? Blonde.
My Father-in-Law (hereinafter known as FIL) did not like blondes.
And my Mother-in-Law hated beards.
These two statements go together.
Just give me a moment . . .
So . . . back to my FIL.
No one knew why he did not like blondes.
And they did ask.
“Dad! Were you dumped by a blonde?”
“Dad! Did some blonde do something horrible?”
“Dad! Could I borrow twenty bucks?” Oh, wait, that has nothing to do with this.
Back to my story . . .
He passed away without ever sharing the reasons for his aversion.
But his family knew it well.
Whenever one of his five sons asked to borrow the car for a date, the first question was, invariably, “She’s not a blonde, is she?”
To which the invariable answer was, “Oh, no, Dad! She’s not a blonde! Definitely not a blonde!”
Even if she was.
The keys would be produced.
The date embarked upon.
All was well.
Yep. FIL’s aversion was well known.
Sometimes a little too well known.
His wife had an aversion as well.
To facial hair.
Here it comes . . .
If her husband ever suggested that he was considering growing a beard, she had the perfect answer.
“I’ll dye my hair blonde!”
Even the remote possibility of beard growing disappeared instantly.
Genius.
In his later years, he did make allowances.
I mean, he personally picked me for his son, and I had the white-blonde hair only found in people of Swedish heritage (like me) or points north.
And, in fact, two of his sons married blondes.
Call it parental opposition.
But the mystery remains.
The only other statement we ever heard from him concerning blondes was, “You know why blondes have more fun, don’t you? Because they get dirty quicker!”
Hmm . . . was that a hint?

14 comments:

  1. Some questions we might not want to know the answer to! LOL

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ha! Sounds like my husband. I have always threatened to dye my hair if he bought a motorcycle. Finally switched over to http://thediaryofanalzheimerscaregiver.com instead of rm29303.blogspot. But I still haven't figured out how to redirect the traffic yet!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ah, Marital balance. It comes in so many ways . . .
      Thank you for the address change! I will follow you . . .

      Delete
  3. Ha! Sounds like my husband. I have always threatened to dye my hair if he bought a motorcycle. Finally switched over to http://thediaryofanalzheimerscaregiver.com instead of rm29303.blogspot. But I still haven't figured out how to redirect the traffic yet!

    ReplyDelete
  4. The important thing is, he made an exception for you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We haven't figured that one out yet, either . . .

      Delete
  5. You must have been awfully special for him to allow a blonde into his family.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It certainly gave the family something to think about! :)

      Delete
  6. I just love the marital balance between the desire to grow facial hair met with the threat of going blond.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Balance. The most important part of any marriage. Would we call this hair-ly balanced?

      Delete
  7. My husband likes when I change my hair color. I think he pretends he's gotten a new wife or something. I would look terrible as a blonde though. I agree with the assumption you don't want to know why he doesn't like blondes. =)

    ReplyDelete
  8. I think he was "pulling your leg", as the saying goes :) All of you. All of your legs. You know what I mean!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I have Swedish ancestry too, on my mother's side so there is a lot of blonde in our family, yet oddly enough I prefer dark hair. Both of my husbands were dark haired although blonde as babies, one of my sons was born dark haired, while the other three kids are all blondes in varying shades.
    I never made a fuss about hair colour when my kids chose partners though. There's no point these days when hair colour can be different every week.

    ReplyDelete

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