Stories from the Stringam Family Ranches of Southern Alberta

From the 50s and 60s to today . . .



Friday, June 15, 2018

While Mom's Away


Mom had to go out for a while.
Actually, her errand should only have taken a few minutes. She needed to go to the DMV and collect her new license. But everyone knows that those places are staffed by sloths (True story. I saw it in a movie once.)
So, she had no idea just how long she would be.
A lot can happen in our home in a short period of time. Just FYI.
In her absence, Mom had put me in charge.
I am two years older than Sally, after all.
Sally, the sly thing, didn’t say a word when Mom delegated me. Merely sat there, with that little half-grin she usually wears. The grin that tells me Sally is . . . thinking.
Not a good thing.
The instant the door closed behind Mom’s I’ve-seen-better-days faded pink coat, Sally turned to look at me. “It’s my turn. Give me the remote,” she announced.
“What?” I protested. “It is not! You’ve had it all afternoon! I just got it!”
“But you’re the one in charge and that means that you have to keep whoever’s in your charge happy.”
“Where does it say that?”
“In any babysitting manual you can find.”
“Well I don’t know where to find a babysitting manual!”
Sally’s smiled widened. “Well, until you do . . .”
“Fine! Take the stupid thing.”
“And I want popcorn.”
“Get it yourself!”
“I’m getting unhappy.”
I rolled my eyes. “You were born unhappy!” I decided I’d had enough. “And you know what? I’m going to hold the remote!”
“You have to get it first!” Sally leaped to her feet, jerked the long, black cord out of the console and started to spin the device with it.
Like some sort of modern-day gamer gladiator.
I prepared myself, balancing lightly on the balls of my feet, hands up, ready to pounce.
Swing. Swing.
The remote went past me a couple of times.
Swing. Pounce! I had it!
For a brief, glorious moment, I felt the cool, molded plastic in my hands, then Sally jerked on the cord and both the stupid appliance and my triumph disappeared.
Now normally I would just prepare myself for round two. That’s what you have to do with Sally.
But this time, she miscalculated. And the remote slid right out of her hands, sailing with uncanny and devastating precision through the hole in the front door screen.
Where it smacked into the head of Mrs. Petrie, who just happened to be standing there, arm raised, ready to knock.
Of course neither Sally nor I had seen her.
Our only clue that she was anywhere in the vicinity came when she let out a little shriek
Just before she pitched over backward.
She must have been coming to collect for something because a little basket of papers and coins went straight into the air.
The coins made little ringing sounds as they rained around her.
The papers started to drift across the grass.
Now I should mention here that we have a new and very nosy neighbour, Mrs. Casper, or Mrs. Gasper, as Sally and I like to call her.
Who just happened to be out on her lawn where she saw the whole thing.
And immediately jumped to the erroneous conclusion that Sally and I were attacking and/or trying to rob poor Mrs. Petrie, now out cold on our brick walk.
The old bat didn’t even try to get at the truth. She merely dialed 911.
Our Mom arrived home just a minute behind the police.
She shouldn’t have been too surprised to see the red and blue lights as she drove up.
I mean, she’s seen them before.
Umm . . . maybe.
She started shrieking, though, when she stepped out of her car to see one of the officers apprehend Sally.
Then things just got confused.
Fortunately, Mom’s good at confused.
She has to deal with Sally and me after all.
While she sorted everything out, Sally and I retreated to the living room.
I plugged the remote back in and sat on the couch.
“It’s my turn,” Sally said.

Mid-month Fridays are the best! That's when Karen of Baking in a Tornado and her rag-tag group of followers exchange words.
And get creative.
This month, my words came from our amazing leader herself!
They were:
apprehend ~ collect brick ~ home ~ remote
How'd I do?
Looking for some more fun?
Hop over to my fellow Karenites and see what they've created!



7 comments:

  1. Okay, where is the camera you have in my house at? Because it is eerie how much that sounds like my girls!

    ReplyDelete
  2. God, that sounds like me and my sister! We also had some epic meltdowns in our youth. So funny and glad Mrs. Petrie survived!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I guess we both wrote about the antics of kids! I have a sister so I'm sorry to say that your story sure does ring true!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Aaaargh.
    Consider me sucked right in.

    ReplyDelete
  5. HaHa this is great! Sounds like some of the squabbles I once had with my siblings...

    ReplyDelete
  6. It all seems like fun and games until the police arrive...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Younger siblings are the worst! Always trying to blackmail us!
    I once threw a shoe at my baby brother. He ducked - and the shoe went right through the window. Which was closed. Oohps. Shards of glass everywhere...

    ReplyDelete

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