Parentisms: The Second Verse

Okay. I'm only going to say this once so pay attention!

A few days ago, I wrote an article about my FIL and his 'Parentisms'.

Little phrases that parents love to use, either as an exclamation point, or just to confuse their children.

Apparently, I struck a nerve.

A good nerve.

Several readers shared their own Parentisms with me

I just had to pass them on . . .

Delores: Mom..."Sit up, shut up and eat up"
Dad..."There's that elf again looking in the window"
Mom..."Don't make me get the fly swatter"

Joanne: Mom's classic: “Don't taste it, just eat it.”

Jeremy: Dad ever stated, “Don't make me pull this car over.”
Mom was equally famous for, “Wait until your father gets home.”

Dr. Ann: One I loved to hate was: "Stop crying unless you want something to cry about!"

Kelly: My Nana used to say, "You look like you were pulled through a hedge backwards," and somehow, I knew just what that meant!

Ah, the memories!

Aren't they priceless?

I would add to those my Mom's famous, “Oh my stars and garters!” Or, “this kitchen is closed due to illness. I'm sick of cooking!” And her favourite, “You have two choices for supper – take it, or leave it!”

And my Dad's “Don't make me come back there!” Or, “If you're going to roughhouse, do it outside!”

But my father lived to recite and many of his most notable Parentisms were designed more to confuse than to exclaim.

“How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?”

It took me years to figure that one out.

Parentisms are fun.

But they can backfire.

For example:

One of Dad's favourite sayings was, “Have you ever seen a gopher gopher a gopher?”

I can't tell you how long it took me to understand that one.

Oh. A gopher go for a gopher.

Ha! Funny!

But this one finally tripped him up.

He was used to his farm kids.

And our rather . . . ribald . . . sense of humour.

One of my cousins was visiting from the big city.

Dad recited his little 'gopher' ditty.

She stared at him, wide-eyed. Then told him, “My dad says that's not nice.”

“Oh.” Dad got a bit red-faced.

And a little more cautious.

But it didn't stop him.

Fortunately for us.