Thursday, July 24, 2014

When Nature Calls

You see a fence post. We see . . . 
Okay, I’m apologizing up front for this story.
It’s . . . gritty. So to speak.
Ahem . . .
I’ve always wondered about toilet paper ads.
Softer. Stronger. More effective.
I mean, why advertise this stuff?
Are there people who are actually not buying it?
Actually . . . yes.
Think of the people who live in places where dropping over to the local grocery store is really not a possibility. Like those in the deepest, darkest part of the jungle.
And their banana leaves.
Okay, I understand. Soft. Strong. Effective.
Now think of the cowboys on the wide, wide prairie.
Where there are no trees at all and leaves simply aren’t an option.
What are they going to do when nature . . . hollers?
Case in point . . .
Dad was out with his dad doing . . . cowboy stuff. Fencing and exploring the joys of barbed wire.
They were far from the ranch house and even farther from the miracle of indoor plumbing.
And its accoutrements.
Grandpa had to go.
You know what I mean.
He turned to Dad. “I’ll be right back,” he said.
Dad nodded and continued with what he was doing.
Grandpa set down his fencing pliers and pulled out his pocket knife.
Dad stared at him, confused. Didn’t he just say . . .?
Grandpa walked over to one of the cedar fence posts and, using said knife, shaved off several pieces of wood.
Then he smiled at Dad and disappeared over the nearest hill.
Can anyone say ‘ouch’?

14 comments:

  1. A very real possibility of splinters.

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  2. Oh, man! That's certainly the "raw material" for toilet tissue, emphasis on "raw" I think :) You know, I never DID think about this before, but every time I see a fence post, or for that matter, even a tree in an empty field, I'll remember this!

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    1. Suddenly those ads for Charmin, etc. take on a new significance! :)

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  3. Oh my...the mind boggles! Now that's one tough rancher!

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  4. Just shows you how tough those cowboys are!

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    1. They always show the old cowboys being tough by shooting off guns and talking like John Wayne. This is the true test . . . :)

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  5. Yes, ouch indeed~ Another fun story and I have always wondered what people have used in these situations. I wonder alot about how the pioneers handled varies things.
    Blessings for an educational one today.

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  6. Boy, they breed 'em tough where you are!
    I remember the squares of torn up newspaper hanging off a meat hook in the dunny down the back of the yard we had when I was a kid, I thought that was bad enough. Shaved cedar seems a tad worse.

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    1. One less step in the whole paper-evolutionary-scale!

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  7. I sure hope grandma didn't have to remove the splinters that must have caused! Love your stories as usual Diane. Talking to hubby about trip to Canada soon!!!!

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    1. I would have balked at that task! Definitely not in my job description! :)

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