He only looks cute. See that hole? Not good. |
Warning: Many, many gophers were mortally wounded seriously harmed in the telling of this story.
I want to preface this story with the fact that gophers, on
a ranch, are bad news. They dig holes that unsuspecting horses and livestock
stumble into, breaking legs and other appendages. They eat bushels of valuable
grain. And they make dozens more little gophers. Who grow up to cause even more
trouble. Thus costing ranchers hundreds, even thousands, of dollars. Gophers may
look cute, with their little dark eyes. Their fur and their ‘chirp’. And their
I.Q. which, if it went up a point or two, would reach the level of ‘imbecile’. But they are very bad news. Think
of them as the little rats of the ranching world.
On to my story . . .
On a ranch, the use of firearms is a necessary skill. Coyotes,
wolves, cougars and other predators can, and do, threaten the herd.
Marksmanship is
also a necessity. If you’re going to use a gun, better hit only what you are
aiming at. There can be no crazed
waving of a gun. No popping off shots indiscriminately.
Let’s put it this way. ‘Bullets leave an indelible mark.’
So we kids on the ranch were taught the proper use of guns.
And, during the summer, had daily target practice.
Our targets? The thousands of gophers that infested the
prairie hills. We were actually performing two feats in one. Perfecting our aim
and ridding the ranch of its number one pests.
It was my turn to be trained in the all-important use of the
‘22’.
Husby loaded me and my trusty little gun into the cab of the
pickup and headed out to the nearest pasture. A piece of land heavily
pock-marked with the mounds dug by our little, furry vermin. For several
minutes, things went well. Gophers would pop out of their burrows. I would aim
and fire.
My record, though not stellar,
was approaching good.
He moved the truck slowly across the uneven ground. A gopher
popped up. And another directly behind it.
I aimed carefully and squeezed the trigger.
Both went down.
I blinked. Two?
We drove closer and I got out. Yep. Two. The second had been
blindsided because of the first. As a
rancher’s daughter, it was one of my finest moments.
Okay. It doesn’t match the contributions made, daily, by the
people fighting disease in every corner of the globe. Or those who constantly
put their lives on the line in our defense.
Still, it’s a record that hasn’t been topped by anyone from
our ranch.
For a country girl, a real contribution.
This week's words?
marksman, stellar, blindsided, indelible, crazed and imbecile.
I'm sure she didn't foresee my using them to describe one of the less-desirable facts of life on a ranch.
Sorry, Delores! :)
Hurry over and see what her other followers have created!
It's a fact of life, even if it makes my heart hurt, and somebody has to do it, so - well done, Diane. When that apocalypse that Pearl often talks about comes, I want to be on your team :)
ReplyDeleteYou'd be welcome, Jenny! :) Us and our trusty 22!
DeleteExcellent use of Delores' words. Gophers have to go, no doubt about it.
ReplyDeleteSad, but true. Pesky little things!
DeleteI hear you about the ranch pests! And like you, I learned to use a .22 pretty young. These days I don't like being around guns, but as a city dweller that kind of makes sense. :)
ReplyDeleteYeah. We've pretty much shelved our guns as well! :)
DeleteStellar marksmanship! A rodent by any other name?
ReplyDeleteExactly!
DeleteLife is different on a ranch, I'm reminded. Of course, we had moles in our yard....didn't shoot them...but....yeah.
ReplyDeleteNever had much of a problem with moles. I guess they can make a mess of your yard, though . . .
DeleteGood shot....good story.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Delores! Not as fun as usual, but true. Too true!
DeleteOH my goodness, Diane! I didn't even notice the word prompts, until I saw them listed at the end! I was that captivated by your tale!
ReplyDeleteOur property outside of Calgary where I grew up was gopher ridden as well. Our cats patrolled and became so fat and full of gophers, we never even needed to provide them with a meal in summer.
I hated gophers, because they ruined many a good uphill for a canter, for fear of a horse tripping and falling in one of their holes!
Bravo for this use of the word challenge from Delores!
We definitely kindred spirits, Susan! :)
DeleteNormally I cringe over stories of shooting critters since I'm a rodent fan--- but you actually had me laughing on this one. Funny as always, Diane.
ReplyDeleteI'm a rodent fan as well, Marcia! So cute and furry. Until I lost a horse to one of their stupid burrows. Sigh. Then it a was no-holds barred them or me!
DeleteThis is tonight's memory...my hubby and his brother bought a 22, since their father was alcoholic guns and hunting wasn't in their vocabulary. My husband passes out at the sight of blood so he has NEVER been hunting. I on the other hand had a father and 4 brothers who lived for hunting. Being the only girl I learned boy things (I'm a clown at fixing my hair and God Lord on the makeup). Back to my story my BIL wanted my hubby to teach him how to shoot it. They put a full bottle of water on a fence post a good ways away. I sat in the kitchen with the SIL and heard bullet after bullet coming from the gun so I walked outside and asked "How ya doing"? To which they both said at the exact same time something is wrong with that gun! I said let's take a look, now my husband has seen me shoot a few times and back in the day I was pretty good. I picked up the 22 and inspected it, all was fine. I looked at the water filled to the brim (20 oz. throw a way). I aimed the gun at the bottle, fired one shot and blew the cap off of the bottle (and never spilled a drop). I looked at their chins on the ground and nonchalantly said "Maybe you were just thirsty" sat the gun down and went back inside to see my SIL staring at me wide-eyed(she had been watching at the window). How did you just do that she exclaimed. My answer...I have no clue, just the luckiest shot ever but if you tell them that I'll deny it to the end!!!! They still talk about the day I handed out shooting lessons!
ReplyDeleteBwahahaha! I love it! I'll never tell . . .
DeleteExcellent use of this week's words!
ReplyDeleteI've only ever seen gophers on TV but I can see the problems they cause ranchers, farmers and the owners of golf courses.
Thank you, River! I've never golfed, but I've heard about their troubles. I can testify to the aggravation they cause us ranchers, though!
DeleteYou did a wonderful job with the words; of course, you always do. I can just envision your shinning moment. Being a farm girl my self; I can totally relate to this one. Those Gopher's are a hugs problem on a ranch or any place for that matter.
ReplyDeleteBlessings on for this one!
Thanks so much, LeAnn! We farm girls have to stick together! :)
Delete