Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Cone-y

My Husby had as secret longing.
Oh, it wasn't a bad thing--unless you were the one purchasing the replacements. And, as I frequently pointed out, someone had to.
Maybe I should explain . . .
My Husby had a secret yearning to run over traffic cones.
You heard me right.
He had always wanted to run them over.
I don't know why.
Because they're there?
Because they silently direct his life?
Because they forbid entrance?
All of the above?
But the fact remained that he would dearly have loved to run one over.
And probably would, if he weren't married to me, the person who happily kept him on the straight and narrow.
“Honey, you're getting a bit close.”
“Honey, you'd better move back into the middle of the lane.”
“AAAHHH! HONEY, YOU'RE GOING TO HIT ONE OF THOSE CONES!!!
Driving with us was an interesting experience.
Moving on . . .
He finally gave in to his urge.
But not in the way you may think.
No.
He went out and bought himself a cone of his very own. For two days, it sat on my kitchen table where he could admire it. Then it found its permanent home in the center of our driveway, close to the garage entrance.
I stared at it.
Then at him. What on earth was he thinking?
I soon found out.
Every night when he came home from work, he drove over it, flattening it completely.
Then, when he backed out in the morning, it sprang back upright ready and waiting to welcome him home once more.
He was a happy man.
And who knew those things were so tough?
If I had found out sooner, I might have let him hit a couple.
Not.
Now, with that taken care of, all that's left is deciding what to do about my secret urge.
To drive through one of those little wooden barriers that they put across restricted roads.
I'll keep you posted.

13 comments:

  1. I've always wanted to take out one of those barriers they have in hospital and doctors office parking lots. Just take a run at it and 'BLAM' blow it right out of there. We should get together one of these days and make like Nike and 'just do it'.

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    1. I'm ready, Delores. We'll be like Thelma and Louise! Oh . . . wait . . .

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  2. I've never had any urges like that ... there's something wrong with me ... lol

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  3. This is too funny because on my way home today there were a bunch of run over cones and I was thinking to myself, "now why would anyone want to run over those cones!"

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  4. I didn't know they resurrected. Learning all the time.

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    1. I didn't either. I'm glad I found it out this way . . .

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  5. I didn't know they healed themselves, either. The things you learn online....

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  6. There is something about authority and power that we want to smash. How satisfying it must be to knock a cone down every now and then.

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    Replies
    1. You're absolutely right. Good thing it was just a cone! :)

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  7. I never had a desire to run over a cone. I was always concerned that there might be something solid inside. Maybe it was from watching Bugs Bunny fighting the bull. He held out the cape and the bull charged it; unbeknown to him there was an anvil directly behind.

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