Thursday, January 20, 2022

Cockroachless

I love Alberta. 
It's beautiful.
Wide, grassy prairies.
High, majestic mountains.
Blue skies.
Clear air.
Warm temperatures.
Okay, I know that it gets cold in Alberta.
And yes, -40 (C or F) is not uncommon.
But, probably because of the extreme temperatures, Alberta is missing a couple of very important things.
And I'm not complaining.
1. Alberta is the only place on earth that has no rats.
None. They are stopped at the borders, asked to produce a current passport, then turned away.
Let's face it, have you ever seen a rat with any passport, let alone a current one?
There is even a designated rat un-welcome committee stationed at every border.
An effective one.
Equipped with guns and traps.
And lots of cheese.
I don't know about you, but that would certainly indicate to me that I wasn't wanted.
Moving on . . .
So . . . no rats.
2. Alberta also has no big bugs.
Okay, we have bugs.
Just not big ones.
I've seen the pictures of people holding cockroaches that reach to their elbows and spiders that could easily carry off small children.
I know what big bugs look like.
And we don't have them.
That makes me happy.
We know how blessed we are.
Case in point:
Our son was preparing to go out to milk.
It was cold.
Alberta cold.
He was layering up at the back door.
Long johns.
Jeans.
Cotton socks.
Wool socks over cotton ones.
Heavy shirt.
Sweater.
Jacket.
Scarf.
Heavy coat.
Touque. (Warm Canadian winter hat)
Gloves.
Mittens.
Boots.
Yep. In Canada, we pretty much invented layering.
And going outside isn't something you do at the spur of the moment.
It takes thought.
And time.
I was preparing breakfast and I could hear my son moving around at the back door.
And mumbling to himself.
I dried my hands and walked over to him.
What I heard was, " . . . cockroaches."
I moved closer.
"We don't get cockroaches," he said.
As he pulled on one sock.
"We don't get cockroaches."
Second sock.
"We don't get cockroches."
Shirt.
"We don't get cockroaches."
Jacket.
And so it went.
The same refrain with each and every layer.
Psyching himself up to open that door and get the blast of cold air in the face.
We live in Alberta.
It is beautiful.
And cold.
But we don't have rats.
Or get big bugs.
Sometimes it takes the one to appreciate the other.

7 comments:

  1. I remember the first time I ever saw a cockroach.... it was when we moved into married students housing at Florida State. I was ... Horrified!

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  2. Somewhere in my blog is a post mentioning palmetto bugs, which is what Carol may be referring to. As for your post, it led to reading Alberta's website about its rat control program (yup, stil successful) but, bad news,you do have roaches.

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  3. We don't get rats or cockroaches either, at least none that I've seen. We do get ants, mice, and spiders, but that's about it and some tiny creatures that make cameo appearances now and again.

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  4. Ah... I live in the land of rats and big bugs and months of single layers... I suppose the time and thought for layering is worth it.

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  5. I'd take snow and -40 to cockroackes any day!

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  6. I wish Australia didn't have cockroaches. But we not only have them, we have several different varieties! Along with everything else "buggy".

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  7. You do learn to deal with them (or to run screaming and make another member of the family deal with them).

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