Thursday, May 3, 2012

Lego - The Leading Edge In Home Defense


Approach with caution!

We were visiting/staying with my husband’s sister.
Her home was in the country, surrounded by acres of Adventure.
Our kids loved it.
They had worn themselves out and were tucked into their respective beds.
The visiting adults had finally followed their example and were peacefully snoring.
My Husby and I were on the hide-a-bed in the family room.
All was quiet.
I should explain, here, that our bed was situated at the top of the stairs.
And that the master bedroom was down said stairs.
And that anyone wanting to use the bathroom would have to walk between our bed and the only source of light in the entire house, the glass doors.
Back to my story . . .
I heard a noise.
As the mother of six, I was instantly awake.
A floor was creaking.
Someone was coming up the stairs.
An adult-sized figure materialized out of the gloom beside me making their slow, careful way towards the bathroom.
For a moment, they were silhouetted against the door/window.
Then they disappeared.
I’m not making this up.
They disappeared.
One moment they were there.
Black cutout against the lighter door.
And the next . . . gone.
I sat up.
“Who’s there? What happened?”
My whisper sounded loud in the stillness.
My Sister-In-Law’s voice from the end of the bed, “[Minor expletive removed here] Lego!”
The figure reappeared, rising up from the floor.
Its gait subtly altered, it continued towards the bathroom.
Only those who have had the misfortune of stepping on a Lego block with an unprotected foot know the pain.
Let’s wince together.
This story’s for us!

P.S. I've just had an amazing thought! Spread Lego blocks around the house for defense. As long as the enemy approaches barefoot, you've got them!

18 comments:

  1. I have done that....the Lego limp.

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  2. And, no child can be handed a dead lego in the morning with the line "You left this on the floor and see what happened." When humans are extinct, lego man will remain.

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  3. Even stepping on them in slippers, it still hurts...

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  4. Nothing compares to finding an unexpected lego block, and given there is around 70 for every man women and child on the planet... I'm guessing chances are there is someone, somewhere standing on one every minute of the day

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    1. We should just stop fighting it I guess. The pain is inevitable . . . and endless . . .

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  5. Haha Diane, you are soo funny, I really enjoy your stories :)

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  6. Thank you Launna! My reward is your smile!

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  7. Oooh yes. the wretched lego limp. My husband's food seems magnetically attracted to them.

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  8. You make me laugh - and yes done that trod on a lego OUCHIE WOWA

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  9. LOL anyone with kids knows this scenerio:)

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  10. Diane, oh I know the Lego Limp all to well in our home! Thanks for the story, made me smile! 8)

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