Saturday, May 9, 2020

The Condiment Test

Mmmmm. 
Sweet, tasty stickiness.
It categorizes you.
Marks your place in the family.
Even decides if you will be granted admission to the family.
It provides delicious accompaniment to your breakfast, and, at times, other meals during the day. (Members of my family eat it the Swedish way, with grilled cheese. Ick!)
It is yummy, and, if not eaten in copious (Ooo, good word!) quantities, is even very good for you.
I'm talking about jam.
Tasty, sticky, always lands toast-side-up. Jam.
More particularly, strawberry vs. raspberry.
It is the family 'Maginot Line'.
You can be on one side or the other.
(Both of which are tasty--or so I'm given to understand.)
But wander over to the other side only in times of dire necessity, like when your server has run out of packets.
My Husby and I realized very early in our marriage that we needed to have a jar of each on the breakfast table.
His - strawberry. Mine - delicious.
Oops.
I mean - raspberry.
And, as our kids grew, they learned to take sides.
Mine.
Except for our second son, who is Switzerland.
And prefers apple jelly.
We don't talk about him.
Moving on . . .
Once the lines were duly drawn in the family nucleus, it was time to start challenging prospective additions [i.e. fiancé(e)s] to declare their preference.
I should point out here that it is a grueling test.
The nervous neophyte is seated at the breakfast table. The two jars are brought forward. The family waits, breathlessly.
And I do mean breathlessly.
If anyone takes their time making a choice, family members have been known to pass out cold.
I won't tell you what we do to them while unconscious.
But I digress . . .
The prospective member of the family makes a choice.
And my side cheers.
It's true.
Every single one has chosen raspberry.
Until one son-in-law.
Who chose . . . poorly.
I maintain that he was coached.
Money might even have changed hands.
So the score now stands at: strawberry - two, raspberry - 10.
And one son who will not be mentioned.
Now for the next generation.
Our eldest grandchildren are more than ready.
Once this pandemic is a part of history, it'll be time to make a serious choice . . .

9 comments:

  1. Love this. You must like it real sweet!

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  2. Definitely raspberry for me. I prefer them fresh to strawberries too. And rarely get enough of them.

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  3. Strawberry for me. Guess I would never fit into your family!

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  4. I'm on the raspberry side as well - with a once a year step into double strawberry jam (Wild and garden strawberries mixed) for the special bins beekn for Store Bededag (Means big day of prayers) which we celebrated this Friday.

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  5. Oh, the battle of the jams! I'm a raspberry person.

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  6. I prefer raspberry, but buy strawberry because the raspberry seeds get caught in my teeth and it's just too much trouble these days to heat the jam and sieve them out. I'm not supposed to be eating jam anyway according to my doctor.

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  7. Strawberry for me, please - partially, like River, because of the seeds.

    TQ likes blackberry.

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  8. Blackberry, please. Or apple butter. Either way, i shall depart for Switzerland post haste.

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  9. I've had to give them both the heave-ho because of the seeds and my digestive 'sensitivities' - so I'm now a grape jelly girl. Please don't give me that look!!!

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