Stories from the Stringam Family Ranches of Southern Alberta

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Wednesday, January 4, 2012

It Moved! It Did!

The Behemoth

Things move.
Big things.
They move.
I have proof.
On the ranch, we had a large power pole.
Full sized.
Firmly planted.
It had been there since the beginning of time.
So . . . for quite a while.
It stood in the very center of the turn-about.
People driving in would go around it, conduct their business and complete the turn as they drove out.
Simple.
Unless you lived there.
Then you would have to drive in and park.
Preferably somewhere out of the way so the next person would have a place to drive in and turn.
At times it got a little . . . tricky.
I lived there.
I had parked.
I needed to leave.
This entailed backing the van up, maneuvering into the lane, then completing the turn to head out.
I should probably point out here that our van could quite easily have been described as a behemoth (good word!). It held 12 passengers.
Or two parents and six children, neatly spaced to avoid argument-age.
Well to try to avoid argument-age.
Well . . . never mind.
I loaded in the kids.
I sorted out the first argument.
I started the van.
I sorted out the second argument.
Good so far.
The third argument started.
I began to unknot that disagreement just as I stepped on the gas.
The van reversed, as it should.
Straight back.
All of us inside were concentrating on the ongoing conversation.
None of us noticed the pole directly behind the van.
Well, not until we smacked into it.
Oops.
I pulled ahead and got out to survey the damage.
The bumper had a lovely crease in it, bending it towards the van and forming a point that made it impossible to open the back door.
Double oops.
Later, when I showed my husband, he shook his head and simply sawed the top point off the dent. Just enough so the door would clear it.
But leaving the dent for all to see.
Sigh.
The conversation went like this . . .
"Honey, didn't you see the pole? The large one that has been standing in the center of the yard since forever?"
"Ummm . . . I don't know how to answer that question."
"You did know about the pole, didn't you?"
"Ummm . . . yes."
"You did see it?"
"Well, it was like this . . . I was backing out carefully . . ."
"Yes."
"And then that nasty old pole just jumped behind me."
"Jumped."
"Yes."
"Right out of the ground."
"Yes. It was the weirdest thing!"
"I'm going to go lie down."
True story.

I also have an experience with Cuba and move-age. But that is another story.

8 comments:

  1. I had a garage door do the very same thing to me. You just can't trust inanimate objects.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Those big ole vans just have a mind of their own. I know--I drove one for years.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh boy! I can relate! I was backing out of a gas pump at the gas station a few years back. I had worked all day. I was exhausted. The kids were tired from school. I backed right into the pickup waiting for their turn at the pump I was using. oops! I still have my crunched back bumper to show for it. In my defense... the kids had my attention. I think that's how most fender benders are, don't you? I think we should always blame them on the kids! :) Glad to see you after your few days away. I hope you had a nice Christmas!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I once did almost the same thing. My husband reaction was about the same too.
    Fun post and I am smiling at this one.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh the extra long trucks/vans always seem to need a lot more room to make turns especially when your brain is occupied by other things causing a bit of distress.
    It happens to the best of us but if it happens to a bus driver he loses his job.
    Go figure.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I was going to list all the things that have happened to me when distracted by kids, but then I thought I better save some words for everyone else. Haha.
    Nice story. So easy to relate to. In my case it was a ditch.

    ReplyDelete
  7. OMG my mother had this very same experience with my Dad and a tree:)!! So funny. I hope you had a wonderful Christmas and New Year, I am finally getting back to reading blogs after taking some time off to focus on family. Welcome to the NOBH crew:) and thanks for linking up

    ReplyDelete
  8. HHHMMMmmm... no visitor seems destined to miss the fountain a couple of metres off our driveway!! I guess it's understandable seeing as it's 4 metres high, 2 metres wide, and surrounded by an ever-growing hedge!!!

    ReplyDelete

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Diane was born and raised on one of the last of the great old Southern Alberta ranches. A way of life that is fast disappearing now. Through her memories and stories, she keeps it alive. And even, at times, accurate . . .

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