Yes |
No |
Remember the 'fashion' dolls of the
fifties?
The straight-standing, frozen featured,
supposedly beautiful dolls?
That creative people crocheted or
knitted clothes for.
Or sunk into cakes.
Those dolls.
Well, besides being known for arriving
'without wardrobe', they were also known for their pre-styled, fine,
beautiful hair.
Hair that was not comb-able.
That stuck together in a tight ball and
defied any efforts at style change.
I know that hair well.
Because I was born with the same stuff.
Fine.
Soft.
And matted permanently together.
Candy-fluff hair, my Mom called it.
Okay, 'candy fluff', I loved.
Candy fluff on my head?
Not so much.
Every morning, and several times
throughout the day, Mom would come at me with a comb.
Or some other implement guaranteed to
make my hair behave.
None of them worked.
All of them . . . hurt.
Mom: “Diane, hold still! I'm almost
done!”
Me: “Waaah!”
And so it went.
As I grew, my hair . . . changed.
Subtly.
Oh, it was still fine and soft.
But it no longer stuck together in one
fuzzy lump.
No.
Now it stuck together in several fuzzy
lumps all over my head.
Sigh.
Mom: “Diane, hold still! There's just
one more!”
Me: “Waaah!”
Finally, by about age eight, I outgrew
the 'fuzzies'.
But made another important discovery.
Yes, my hair no longer matted together,
defying all attempts at style.
And it was now longer and straighter.
But . . . it still hurt to comb it.
Yes. I was a hair wuss.
Mom: “Diane, hold still! Your hair
will look beautiful!”
Me: “Waaah!”
Finally, in frustration one day, she
uttered the fateful words, “Diane, don't you know you have to
suffer to be beautiful?”
I stared at her. “Really?”
She nodded sagely.
Wow.
I put it together.
If I suffered, I would be beautiful.
It was that simple.
This went on for several years.
Every day, I suffered.
Every day, I looked in the mirror.
Nope. Same face as yesterday.
Finally, at age fifteen, I challenged
my mother's hypothesis.
Me: “Mom! I've suffered! Why aren't I
beautiful!?”
Mom (In true 'Mom' form): “Oh, honey,
you ARE beautiful!”
Right. Wait. Who made this rule?!
I see where this is going . . .
Moving ahead several years . . .
I was combing my granddaughter's fiery
red, naturally curly hair.
ME: “Kyra, hold still! I'm almost
done!”
Kyra: “Waaah!”
Me: “Don't you know you have to
suffer to be beautiful?”
She stares at me. “Really?”
And so the story continues . . .
Tricky, tricky. How did you get a red headed grandchild?!?!? I never did.
ReplyDeleteI know! Weird, eh?
DeleteI remember Mom trying to comb your hair. And yes, you were not enjoying it. That doll at the top of the page. I remember those being sold at rummage sales. I think back in the 60s when every female's bathroom had one to hide the spare roll of bum fodder. A guy's bathroom merely had the spare roll on the vanity or on the toilet tank lid.
ReplyDeletePfff! Guys!
DeleteYep...we tell each other those lies generation after generation...I've suffered let me tell you and I'm STILL not beautiful. I did have one of those dolls though. My gran made it a beautiful dress and hat and it sat in the middle of my bed as decoration.
ReplyDeleteMy sister had one, too! It always sat on her bed. Except when I pinched it. Hmm . . . another blog???
DeleteIsn't that precious!
ReplyDeleteMy kids all had short hair and my hair became so straight that even when I curl it it's straight.
(sigh)
That's me . . . now. I guess all I suffered for was to end up with non-curly hair!
DeleteHaha, at least you didn't look 'perfect' like one of those dolls! Downunder, the crocheted skirt was often used to hide a spare toilet roll in the smallest room in the house!!!!
ReplyDeleteUgh, Perfection!
DeleteMy brother was just He says it was never found in guy bathroom. Pity . . .
The things we say to our children when we want them to do something, lol. We become very inventive as parents:)
ReplyDeleteYep. Mom had me convinced that . . . someday . . . I would be beautiful! If I just suffered enough . . .
DeleteYou suffered for nothing. Perfection cannot be improved upon.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous Husby-type Secret Admirer