Server and Servee. |
I'm a people-pleaser.
Or try to be.
Call it a weakness.
But I've always had this compulsion to make everyone around me as comfortable as possible.
Most of the time, it's fun.
Occasionally, not.
Let me tell you about it.
When I was first married, my greatest wish was to see my new Husby happy, comfortable and well-fed.
I worked hard at it.
Fortunately, he is a kind and considerate man, so all was well.
I had meals ready at meal times.
Kept the laundry done.
Cleaned the house.
Ran errands for him.
This went on for some time.
Then, I began to realize that some of the 'errands' were jobs he could have done equally well himself.
And probably should.
Case in point:
Whenever he would use a tissue ( Kleenex), he would then hand me said used tissue and I would hunt for a garbage to throw it in.
True story.
Can everyone say “gullible”?
This went on for nearly three years.
Then, one day, we were at a reception.
My Husby used a tissue and turned and held it out to me.
Now, the normal people-pleasing Diane would have taken it and found a place to dispose of it.
The new Diane looked at the tissue, then at my Husby and said, “Throw it out yourself.”
Whereupon (good word) he laughed and stuck it into his pocket. “Finally caught on, did you?” he said.
And that's when I hit him.
Oh, not hard.
Just enough for him to know that I was . . . displeased.
And that he could run his own stupid errands from now on.
Ha!
There.
I said it.
Erm . . . can I take that for you?
I'm so glad I'm not the only one! After 23 years I still catch myself. When we first got married I would fix big meals every night, finally he looked at me and said can't we just have some soup and a sandwich? Well I was pregnant with my daughter and being hormonal and all, I dumped a plate of spaghetti on his head!
ReplyDeleteRena, you crack me up. LOL
DeleteMine is still badly spoiled and I have only myself to blame for it. I guess it's too late now.
ReplyDeleteSigh.
DeleteOh, aren't we well trained in this generation!
ReplyDeleteToo well trained!
DeleteGood for you, Diane! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks, Kelly! :)
DeleteDid you punch him hard enough?!
ReplyDeleteIn years past, I waited upon my husband like you wrote. And just a few years ago, I stopped. He started getting the laundry, loading the dishwasher, etc. And I had to ask myself: why didn't we do this sooner?
We are from that generation, aren't we.
That's exactly what I was thinking. WHY didn't I do this sooner?!
DeleteI'm gobsmacked! You took his used tissues for three years?? glad you finally stopped. I'm laughing here.
ReplyDeleteI'm a people pleaser too, but not to that extent. and I have to admit I'm a lot less into pleasing people than I used to be. Even visitors to my home have to make their own coffee. Because only then can they get it just the way they like it.
Three. Years. Ugh! I like that - get your own coffee! Must think about this one . . .
DeleteHaha, great story, Diane! And you describe the interaction so well. :)
ReplyDeleteWow, you were exceptionally dedicated! And what is it with men and Kleenex - they never carry any of their own, and rely on us ladies with big purses to provide :)
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you finally saw the light lol!!
ReplyDeleteLoved the story! I remember wanting to be "the good wife" when I got married. I too tended to be the people pleaser. Thanks for sharing
ReplyDelete