Yes |
Yes. This story is about sex.
Ahem . . .
I was raised on a ranch.
There are animals on a ranch.
Animals that do ‘animal stuff’.
Eating. Sleeping. Growing.
Making other ‘little’ animals.
Which then eat. And sleep. And grow.
And make other little . . .
You get the picture.
It was the rhythm of life throughout my childhood.
The statement, ‘I grew up with it’?
Applies here.
My earliest memory of the whole ‘animals fulfilling the measure of their creation’ happened when I was four.
Roundup.
A great red and white sea of animals had been penned in the main corrals.
One jumped atop another.
“Daddy, what’s that cow doing?”
My dad turned and looked. Then realized that he wasn’t quite ready to explain the whole reproductive process to his wide-eyed daughter. “Oh,” he said. “Ummm . . . resting his feet.”
“Oh.” I was satisfied.
For a while.
Oh, he did explain things.
Later. When the whole ‘resting his feet’ explanation started to wear a bit thin.
Yes, being raised on a ranch is an eye-opening experience.
By the time I was in grade nine, I knew it all.
Or thought I did.
We were in biology class. My favourite science.
The teacher was talking about animal reproduction.
Yawn.
Specifically: chickens.
“Now the chicken ovulates once a day,” he was saying. “That’s where we get our yummy, delicious eggs.”
I was with him this far.
“But when . . . exposed . . . to a rooster, the egg becomes fertilized and a chick results.”
Wait a minute.
Roosters have a purpose? Other than the obvious one of chasing us kids around and being generally obnoxious?
Hold the phone!
Unfortunately, my astonishment was, much to my dismay, expressed verbally. “What?!”
Whereupon (good word) every kid in the class turned and looked at me.
And snickered.
Sigh.
Yep. I was nearly 14.
And I had just learned that birds follow the same reproductive channels (so to speak) as other animals.
Okay. Now, I knew it all.
My dad never let me be around when the boar was getting friendly with the sow. Really prudish.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure that's what my dad wanted as well!
DeleteI can remember being told that mating grasshopper were playing 'piggyback'.
ReplyDeleteAnd still have lots to learn.
Oooh! Daddy would have loved that one!
DeleteAn advantage to a parent growing up in the big city with children. Rarely having to explain.....
ReplyDeleteExcept for the occasional dogs in the street!
DeleteI got the same piggyback story as EC, but from the kids at school who were horrified when I told them what the animals were really doing was making new babies.
ReplyDeleteI can just see the looks on their faces. Kinda like mine when the teacher explained. When I was 14...
DeleteThe facts of life were explained to me, via an illustrated book, when i was 7. The book started with flowers, moved up to chickens, then dogs, then people. Maybe that wasn't such a bad way to learn.
ReplyDeleteActually, it sounds fantastic. I wonder if one can still find that book...
DeleteIf it wasn't for my best friend in elementary school I wouldn't have known anything . . . I think my parents were in denial :)
ReplyDeleteFarm kids seem more mature in many ways, in my opinion. They seem to be given more responsibility at a younger age and just grow up more rounded and capable. I base that opinion on the kids who I went to school with. I grew up in the country, but not on a farm, so I was like a town kid. The farm kids were way ahead of the rest of us.
Except in knowing the world. Which I didn't. Yikes!
DeleteOhh, my ears turned red from just reading this. Seeing is not always equal to knowing. Not that long ago, I spoke to an elderly country lady, mom and grandmom of many. She had just learned that a cow needs a calf once a year or thereabout to keep the milk flowing. We newer will know it all.
ReplyDeleteI agree. My grandkids are teaching me about to modern world now! ;)
DeleteWait for it.....
ReplyDelete:)
Delete