Stories from the Stringam Family Ranches of Southern Alberta

From the 50s and 60s to today . . .



Wednesday, January 20, 2021

Death by Toddler

Oh, she only looks innocent...
The soft cascade of warm water and sweet-smelling soap caresses the aged body, following every curve.
And/or bulge.
Problems and irritations disappear down the drain with the water as total relaxation is, finally, achieved.
The warm water continues.
A state of near-bliss is achieved.
Ahhh . . .
Cue: Sharp strings played in a tight Eee! Eee! Eee! Eee!
The shower curtain is pulled back abruptly.
The shower-er spins about with a startled gasp.
A shadowy figure sticks its head into the cubicle.
“Hey! Gramma! What’cha doing?!”
And ‘Gramma’ collapses and dies of a heart attack.
Okay, it doesn’t quite have the punch of the original Psycho. But the death is just as real.
And permanent.
Death by Toddler!
Coming soon to a shower near you.
Rated: ‘T’ for Toddler. There is no stronger rating…

P.S. Grandma is looking into locks for her bathroom door. It has suddenly come under the heading: Essential.

5 comments:

  1. Hehe, now the children had stopped doing this, I finally thought I could have the bathroom to myself ... not!

    ReplyDelete
  2. My bathroom in the master bedroom doesn't even have a door (who builds a house like that anyway), I put up curtains but they stop no one. Fortunately I could lock the bedroom door.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Not a grandma, but I imagine my day is coming.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ah, yes, they will seek you out and find you, no matter where you hide.

    ReplyDelete
  5. No toddlers here, but I do have a cat who waits just outside the shower curtain and the minute I turn off the taps, she is in there lapping up the water and letting all the cold air in on my wet skin.

    ReplyDelete

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