2. Keep happy and joy will form a shield against difficulty.
3. The trouble with some of today's smart kids is that they don't smart in the right place.
4. You can't get rid of a temper by losing it.
5. Confidence is that certain feeling you have just before you know better.
6. If the shoe fits, it's out of style.
7. The best way to lose weight is to eat all you want of things you don't like.
8. The nicest thing about being quiet is that you will seldom be picked to head a committee.
9. If you know you've lost your head, you've made a good find.
10. Optimist: A person who thinks the cleaner is shrinking his suits.
11. A bargain is where two people are sure they got the better of each other.
12. The best thing about the good old days is that we were young.
13. Years of square meals add up to a nice round figure.
14. There are still a few things you can get for a dollar: nickels, dimes and quarters.
15. A father is a man who expects his son to be as good as he meant to be.
16. Lord, help me to admit when I am wrong. And make me easier to live with when I am right.
17. To err is human. To really louse things up takes a computer.
18. The young look into the future. The old look into the past. The middle-aged look worried.
19. I've changed my mind. I hope this one works!
20. I do not come to teach. I come to listen to you.
21. Wise people talk when they have something to say. The rest of us talk to say something.
22. Doing nothing is fine. Unless you make it a full time project.
23. A speech often resembles a wheel. The longer the spoke, the greater the tire.
24. People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.
25. Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong.
And my favourite:
A minister apologized for the bandage on his chin. "I was thinking about the sermon and cut my face." In the collection plate he found this note, "Next time, think about your face and cut your sermon!"
